The first attempt involved tofu. Now let me explain tofu to those who have never really experienced it fully. It's like nothing-flavored gelatin. I had foolishly purchased the firm tofu, expecting it to be (you guessed it) firm! It was nothing of the sort. It was shakier than a parkinson's patient going through heroin withdrawels trying to get a thread through the head of a needle. Needless to say the texture was less than satisfying. "Why is this called firm tofu?", I asked myself. Well there is extra firm tofu, which apparently is actually firm. So the scale of tofu goes: Soft, Firm, and Extra Firm. What ever happened to medium?
The next funnest part of cooking curry was the coconut milk. Fuck coconut milk. Seriously. When it says on the can that it seperates it doesn't go into detail how there is a pure liquid underneath a solid inch of white clay. Mixing the coconut milk back into a viscocity worthy of curry took a lot of churning and quite a bit of spilling all over the fucking place because I'm mixing coconut clay with coconut water in a tiny god damned can.
Once that was figured out it was mostly smooth sailing. Until I ate it. The tofu was absolutely awful. It was like eating ass fat. That's exactly the texture than I imagined it would be most like. It crumbled needlessly into smaller and smaller bits until all it was just soup in my mouth. I also bit down on a huge chunk of chutney, which was pretty awful. They don't tell you that the chunks of fruit don't taste nearly as good as the rest of it.
Overall my first attempt was sub-par, but my second attempt was much better. I'm unskilled at cooking meat currently, so I didn't put any meat in. Next time will see the introduction of some poultry, and more coconut milk for a thicker sauce.
This has been Plain White T with Cooking with CBA
